In honor of the NHL Playoffs, we’re looking at how hockey is really just Gossip Girl on ice.
1. The verbal fighting: There is a lot of trash talking in hockey, and we all know no one does insults as well as Blair Waldorf.
2. The physical fighting: Hockey is notorious for fights, and Blair and Serena (as well as Dan and Nate) also threw a few punches (and headbands) in their day.
3. The city pride: Every team represents a city and wants to bring the cup home for its fans and fellow residents, and the GGers want to make NYC proud.
4. The rankings: In the playoffs, the teams are ranked and the Division Leader (#1 seed) plays the wildcard team. Think of this as Blair battling Jenny. The #2 team plays #3 team, so this is like Chuck vs Nate (and who is 2 and who is 3 depends on what season you’re watching and what hairstyles they have).
5. The eliminations: After a team loses four games (every series is best of seven), they are sent home and the tournament (and world) moves on without them. This is like when Jenny and Vanessa got kicked off on GG and no one cared (and some even cheered).
6. The uniforms and accessories: Hockey players need a lot– jersey, skates, stick, pads– to play the game, and the girls of Constance Billard need a lot– outfit, headband, jewelry, purse, cellphone– to pretend like they are going to do work.
7. They love to drink (from fancy cups): The best part about hockey is the Stanley Cup trophy, and the best part of the Stanley Cup finals is watching the players drink from the trophy. It’s kind of like watching S or B sip from the perfect martini while they plan their revenge. #BecauseItsTheCup
8. Fans: All sports have loyal fans, and Blair and Serena do too. The best part is both dress like wannabe players or mini me S’s and B’s.
9. They fall: While hockey players tend to physically fall more than any GG character, Blair and company fall mentally and emotionally more than any other characters on TV…
10. …And then they celebrate: They always get up and come back fighting and cheering after a fall. In hockey they typically celebrate a win or a goal, and on Gossip Girl they celebrate false pregnancy tests and Thanksgiving take-downs, but that’s all relative.
11. Winning: Whether the idea is to be the Stanley Cup Champions or to win Queen of the Met Steps, both goals are ultimately the same: #winning.
Gossip Hockey Girl