New York Fashion Week brings out the most unlikely pairs, and I think it’s time to come out and say what the celebrities were really thinking about next to their fellow celebs (and how their conversations really went).

Jay-Z, Beyoncé, Kim, North West and Anna Wintour:

Jay-Z: This drink is not strong enough.

Beyoncé: The answer is no, Kim, Blue Ivy would not behave like this is public. And no, she is not available for play-dates.

Kim: Why is she crying? Nanny #1 fed her, nanny #2 changed her and I picked out a fabulous outfit for her to wear.

North West: Beyoncé, please take me home with you! Somebody save me from more selfies with Kim!

Anna: I knew I would regret putting Kimye on the cover of Vogue.

Uzo Aduba, Katie Holmes, Mary J. Blige and Rihanna:

Uzo: Let me in the selfie or I will go Crazy Eyes on all of you!

Katie: It’s so nice to be included in a picture with someone besides Suri.

Mary J: How does this think work?

Rihanna: How do I request a seat change?

Zendaya, Kelly Osbourne and Kesha:

Kelly: I don’t know why people don’t take me seriously at Fashion Week.

Zendaya: I wonder if Kelly knows her hideous purple hair is why people don’t take her seriously at Fashion Week.

Kesha: I am so much cla$$ier now that I dropped the $ in my name and went to rehab. I own Fashion Week.

Person to the left: This is the best photobomb of all time.

Odell Beckham Jr. and Anna Wintour:

Odell: Who am I sitting next to? Do you think she saw my one-handed catch?

Anna: I could definitely date this young man to my left for quick second.

Joe Jonas and Victor Cruz:

Victor: I don’t know man, I think right shark was just as great as left shark.

Joe: Ok, fine, whatever, do you think you could help get me a gig at the next Super Bowl halftime show? I understand if it’s just as a backup singer.

Olivia Palermo and Dianna Agron:

Olivia: We’re both famous for being on a show for a few seasons and then never doing anything again!

Dianna: Exactly! And we were the best parts of The City and Glee.

Alec Baldwin and Tim Gunn:

Alec: I really didn’t mean the whole anti-gay comment a few years ago, I, uh, do you want me to move?

Tim: Yes. We will not be able to make it work.

Zosia Mamet and Victoria Justice:

Victoria: This is so exciting! I love the show Girls. I’m totally a Shoshanna, too.

Zosia: I have no idea who this is.

Harper Beckham, David Beckham and Anna Wintour:

David: Anna, Posh wanted me to ask you if Harper could be on the cover of Vogue soon.

Anna: If she can refrain from crying for the rest of show, we can talk.

Harper: I don’t care if anyone can see me picking my nose. I’m Harper Seven, bitch.

Pics from http://www.people.com.