14 Things I’m Probably Thinking About When You’re Talking To Me

I haven’t written a blog in over a week because I’ve been listening to the Gilmore Guys podcast and taking snapchats on the elliptical, but I’m back and want to fill the world in on what I’ve been trying to start conversations about with my uninterested coworkers.

1. Prince George wears Crocs: Obviously #1 on my list, everyone’s favorite toddler rocked Crocs when he was playing outside with his mom, and now the whole world is buying the hideous shoes again. The company reported a surge in sales after the photos, but I’m not mad about it because Prince G looks so damn cute. #TalkToTheHandHaterz

Prince George British Royals at Beaufort Polo Club, Gloucestershire, Britain - 14 Jun 2015 (Rex Features via AP Images)

2. T Swift Fights Crime: Taylor Swift was spotted wearing a harness and a t shirt with the lyrics to Fight Song on it, and blackmailed Apple Music to paying artists during its free trials. She also has the best crew of sidekicks a girl could ever ask for, and IMO, that’s all the makings for a Superhero.


Sidenote: Tay’s ex Joe Jonas went to her concert with Gigi, and Gigi is the star of Calvin Harris’ (who is Taylor’s current beau) new music video. This is all getting to be a little Sister Wives, don’t ya think?


3. The Mary-Kate and Ashley Olympics: While Uncle Jesse was busying getting a DUI, MK and Ash were hosting their own version of the Olympics for their 29th birthday party. Their friends were either on Team MK or Team Ashley, and obvi Ashley won. The only problem is they didn’t tape the party for a reunion episode of “You’re Invited.”


4. Summer TV on ABC: Between The Bachelorette being more dramatic and over the top than ever, Astronaut Wives Club and Mistresses, trashy TV on ABC is OP. AWC is basically Mad Men but with actors from Josh Schwartz shows (Gossip Girl, The OC, Chuck, Hart of Dixie all represented) and they’re launching into space instead of launching a new campaign. The drama is heating up, and it goes well with Mistresses, which I thought would suck without Alyssa Milano, but Team Joss and hot Harry forever.


5. Grey’s Anatomy Season 12: Izzy Stevens is speaking out about how she can’t imagine Grey’s without McDreamy, and while I’m still unsure about how the show will go on, there’s a lot of casting news. Martin Henderson is set to hit Grey Sloan Memorial as a new hot doc, and Bailey’s hubby Ben has become a series regular. And while Ellen Pompeo’s contract is up at the end of next year, Jessica Capshaw just signed on to wear Arizona’s heelys for THREE more years… #WillGreysEverEnd?!


Bonus: Jackson Avery’s real life wife is preggers! I bet April is pissed.

6. Selena’s Love Life: Ms. Gomez and her potential new boyfriend Ed Sheeran were at the same party as her ex Justin Bieber, but she managed to avoid him. The bigger issue is if she’s actually dating Ed Sheeran and they break up, Taylor would have to pick sides and that could get ugly. Also, I just don’t see it. #SorryNotSorry


7. #LoveWins trends for days: Speaking of #love, everyone knows that gay marriage finally became legal on Friday, and celebs celebrated (who wouldn’t want to celebrate the fact that Willow from Buffy or Jack from Dawson’s Creek could get married now!)

8. North’s Disneyland Adventure: America’s favorite direction turned 2 and she celebrated at Disneyland. Tyga brought his kid, Khloe ditched, Kanye fell asleep and a good time was had by all. Kendall was also there, but probably won’t be invited next year because she just passed Kimye as the most liked picture on Instagram. #Drama


9. Kelso and Hyde are Getting Back Together: Ashton Kutcher and Danny Masterson are reuniting for a new Netflix show called The Ranch. The duo will play siblings in the comedy, and it is expected to have 20 episodes. Here’s hoping Mila Kunis stops by too.


10. Jennifer Lawrence Walrus: I’m assuming J Law had a little too much to drink at a sushi restaurant, and took her chopsticks to go. Or she is just wanted to give the paparazzi a show. Either way, I’m all about this becoming a trend and planning on keeping chopsticks in my purse.


11. Shocking breakups: It’s been a rough couple weeks for Hollywood love. Nick Jonas & Olivia Cupo, Sean Penn & Charlize Theron and Britney Spears & Charlie Ebersol all called it quits. Nick and Olivia are young, but I thought the other two couples might have been the endgame for the stars. I’m not too invested in Charlize’s life, but Britney needs a man– Jake Gyllenhaal? Drake? Bueller?


12. True Detective 2: The HBO drama is back with new stars– Vince Vaughn, Colin Farrell, Rachel McAdams and Taylor Kitsch– and it’s super confusing, but kind of intriguing. I wouldn’t mind having a lengthily discussion about potential theories, or IDK, whether or not Riggins looks hotter with short or long hair.

True Detective season 2 walk 3

13. Kanye, Zayn and Joe: One of the weirdest trios of all time sat together at a show, and I can’t help but wonder what the hell they talked about. Did Kanye even know who they were? Did Zayn and Joe start a duo called “Washed Up Boy-band Members?” Did they debate Bobbi Kristina’s boyfriend’s role in her accident at length? I wish I knew.


14. BB17: It wouldn’t be summer without Big Brother. This group is very out there and kind of annoying, but sometimes those crazies make for the best TV. I’m predicting James, Liz, Vanessa, Austin and Clay going pretty far.


In other news, the Taco emoji is coming, Gigi Hadid bought a cat, Giuliana Rancic got a snapchat, and you should look forward to my special Bachelor post (and catch up on my recaps) coming tomorrow.

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